barnyard the original party animals is the uncontested lord of bad implications in childrens movies
ok so like “the secret life of x” movies tend to not strongly explore the actual reasons why, exactly, their life has to be secret… they don’t really focus on it within the narrative. They do usually have some small justification for why animals or video games or toys or whatever have never just revealed themselves:
There’s no stated reason. They just pretend to not be alive. We usually can suspend our suspension of disbelief here because when it’s something like a video game or an emoji because any odd occurrences is perceived as a glitch or something similar but the actual reason why they aren’t too hung up on this kinda shitty lot in life isn’t said
They get something out of their current relationship with humans (like in toy story)
They have some specific reason to hide that they’re alive, like they die if they’re seen (like in the christmas toy)
They perceive themselves as sentient, talking creatures, but humans can’t understand them. They just see a squeaking mouse or an inanimate hot dog or whatever.
and the last one is what most animal movies do, and it’s like, not devoid of weird implications but you can see where it mostly works.
but barnyard is the outlier here: it goes with tier one: the animals can talk and walk on two legs but just pretend that they can’t for unstated reasons.
in the history of the barnyard world non human animals, at some point, decided to just pretend to be unable to speak. a “cow” or a “coyote” or a “hen” do not exist as we know it in the barnyard universe. the baa of the sheep is false; the ewe doesn’t understand it either. they only made up that noise to hide the fact that they speak human languages. a dog barking and running on all fours is a facade. animals naturally walk on their hind legs and made up whole postures just to appear non sentient.
and for what? what do they gain from this? they have no rights and no voice by their own choice. at one point a donkey claims the farmer is a good person because he’s vegan and a pig mentions bacon - this is not a fantasy universe devoid of death and misery and meat. do animals, in hushed whispers, remind their children not to sob in their real voice as they’re taken away? do the dogs not beg for kindness when they’re tied up and hit? do cows and chickens not cry for their life in the slaughterhouses? does a rat not scream a human scream when the trap misses their neck and only breaks their spine? Why? what is the point? They loose so much and have everything to gain.
anyways does everyone remember this really awful cat. it only appears in one scene but i can just sense the porn of it that would pop up if i googled it’s name
This post is like being tied to a chair as a a joker-style villain monologues and presses a gun closer and closer to my head as he reaches the climax of his rehearsed piece on the flaws of society and when he finally pulls the trigger it’s a little flag that says “bang!”
it’s so funny how iroh is always just like “oh don’t look at me I am but a stupid old man” and if anyone is like “um… no…… you’re the Dragon of the West” he’s like “what? that was , like, ages ago. six years ago, even. I’m stupid now. my brains turned to mush!” and then they just believe him and completely let their guard down. I love it
ma’am this is a John Lennon/Paul McCartney erotica blog
and SCENE! that was my impersonation of what i think tumblr would be like in the late 1960’s. just to clarify this is a joke. this isn’t real. there is no beatles erotica here. it’s a bit. it’s a joke
this post is a failure because I was completely willing to accept both John/Paul fanblog and people demanding political positions on the Vietnam War in 2020 without question
i don’t spend a lot of time on this wretched website anymore bc every time i open the app it freezes for like a minute every couple posts and i don’t have that kind of patience
this is so fucking funny they just took yandere simulator and remade it from the ground up but better in basically every way and it only took two weeks and $0
a yandere simulator remake was finished before yandere simulator
When I blow SALM a kiss he acts like the kiss was something ballistic and does full body slow-motion miming of being struck, usually a headshot or through the neck, crumpling to his death as blood spurts dramatically from his neckvein or brainmatter out his skull
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